The Ode

We are not famous mountain climbers, 

but we walk along and climb some of the largest mountains in the world. 

We are not thrill seeking white water rafters, 

but we've floated down long winding and rocky rivers. 

We are not recognized and renound motivational speakers, 

but we speak hope to people anywhere and everywhere. 

We are not doctors and nurses with degrees and large salaries, 

but we give medicine to those who don't have it. 

We are not teachers, 

yet we are always teaching. 

We are not contractors or architects, 

but we build homes, libraries, and whatever else is needed. 

We are not councilors and psychiatrists, 

but we reconcile families. 

We do not have a paying job,

 but our work is ever before us. 

We are not scholars,

 but we study some of the most difficult and important questions ever asked. 

We are not the leaders of a cause, 

but we will constantly speak, and we will live and die for our beliefs. 

We are often alone, the only one who will stand, 

but we are never really alone. 

We are missionaries. 

Thoughts and Facts

The first week of school is finished, and tomorrow I begin the next. I told you all that I think this is going to be fun, and that still goes. It mostly feels like I am adding pieces to a puzzle and hope to eventually get a whole picture. The first week left me pretty tired though, and I will have to figure out how everything will go with the students here at Penuai, but I think that will work itself out given time. 

Right now it is the end of the dry season, so there are flies all over the place, and during the day it gets really hot...this is good for drying clothes, but it makes walking, or really doing almost anything in the middle of the day difficult. 

I just watched the King and I with my roommate Yuli, which was an interesting experience. I feel a little bit like I can relate to the movie, being from America and coming to Asia to teach English...although these children are not the children of a temperamental king... I can still sing "Getting to Know You" and there are still things that happen that I don't really know what to do with. It was really fun watching it with someone from an Asian culture, also someone who had never seen it before. 

There are so many things in my head right now that I wish I could put down here for you, they are all about what I am doing here, and what I feel that God is doing. It is about my own personal feelings and dealings, and about the whole of Indonesia. I don't want to just tell you about my day and what I do all the time, but I don't really know how to tell you the rest. I mentioned about the King and I because I just so enjoyed the beauty of the movie, the story the culture, and the knowledge that I am here in Indonesia teaching English. I feel more like a woman than I ever have before. That is a really personal statement for me to say, but I want to let you all who are praying for me to know what is really going on. I feel that I am doing not just Gods will, but I am doing things that I was always meant to do. 

This afternoon I spent time with two of my friends, one of them is nine months pregnant, and we are always around her to help her as there is not a man in the picture at the moment. After we spent time with her we walked around and got coffee, ran a few errands, and then came back to Penuai. It was a simple day, nothing out of the ordinary, but I felt that everything that I did was worth something. I enjoyed the entire day. I am not sure of exactly how this is all going to pan out, what I will do after I finish learning Indonesian, or anything like that, but now I am content to just be here. I just want to say thank you all for your prayers and support. I am so grateful to you for what you do. It is what keeps me here, both practically, and emotionally. So, just a few thoughts to finish off the week and begin a new one. Love you all. 

First Week

Monday morning I finally started school at IMLAC! At IMLAC they have 9 units, each unit is 4 weeks, and then we have a week off. Unit 1 focuses mostly on the ability to have simple conversations with Indonesians, and works on vocabulary, basic grammar and pronunciation. But by the time I am done with unit 9 I should be able to communicate in most situations, and read and write the language quite well. So far, I am having fun, but I have been much more tired than I anticipated. I go to school every morning at 8 and am there until 12. Four hours really isn't bad...in word, but in reality, day in and day out, it is difficult. I am fortunate that I had been trying to listen and learn while I was here the last time, because now as I am learning the basic things, I have a much better understanding of how it all works. I was at the point where I understood, but I didn't know...I knew that those two words were similar, but I didn't know when one was appropriate and not the other. An example is "kami" versus "kita" both mean "we" but one includes the person you are talking to and the other one does not. Now I know =)

The program is designed to be helpful, but most of the work and practice is entirely up to you as a student. Thus, my homework is to talk to 15 Indonesian people a day, make friends with my neighbors and so on. The reason for this is that they want us to be immersed in the culture so that by the time we are done we have not only the ability to communicate, but we have friends and understand the culture, and have honestly the ability to live in Indonesia. They not only teach the language, but will answer any and all questions that we may have about culture and appropriateness. 

During my 4 hours of class I have 5 teachers. I like them all, and I think (hope) that they will become friends in the future, I am also meeting a lot of people from America and Europe...most of them have trouble finding Indonesian friends, but as I live with all Indonesian people it is kind of novel for me to have American friends. My experience here has been so different from theirs! Most of the students at IMLAC are here with an organization of some kind, and are learning the language as a stepping stone to go to other islands. They have western homes and friends, and know where all of the western places to eat are. In fact, when I tell my teachers that I ate rice for breakfast they are happily surprised. Honestly I am a little bit surprised by how different my experience has been from theirs, but I am glad of it. I like the idea that I am experiencing the real Indonesian culture, and not a westernized version of it. Even the fact that I was my own clothes is very different, yet part of the culture. Honestly it is really difficult sometimes because it is so different, and I am so steeped in the culture here, yet I know it is still not as deep as it could be. During the holiday of Idul Fitri last month I went to some houses in the village, and I saw really how Indonesians live. I feel that I am one step further than some of the other students, but that there are more steps to take. 

All of my friends and students here at Penuai are extremely excited that I am learning the language  Actually, I am at the point where if someone is speaking slowly, I can understand about half of what they say... as long as it is basic language... there are still a lot of words, however, that I don't know, and really need to learn so that I can really understand how it all works. But, that is why I am at IMLAC. Last night I was talking to one of my friends, and I told her something that had happened to me, using Indonesian, and when I was finished, she laughed out loud and asked me to tell it again. I love watching peoples reactions when I speak "bahasa" (they call their language bahasa Indonesia, bahasa for short) Also, usually the question I get more than any other is weather or not I can speak bahasa yet. They are always pleased to hear that I can speak a little bit. 

You know, it is really amazing how much you can show people that you care about them by speaking to them in their language. It really is a testimony to them. That is why I decided to learn the language, besides the practicality...I must learn Indonesian if I am going to spend any amount of time here. It is a way to show them that I want to talk to them, I want to understand them, and know about them. You have heard the saying "People don't care how much you know until the know how much you care." This is a true statement, and the longer I am here the more I care, and the more I want to tell them so. Every time I get tired, or a headache, or don't want to study, this is what I must remember. They are my motivation. My hope is to become their inspiration... to show them that they can do whatever they want, to show them that life can be good, and to tell them that they have a voice, that people care about them. I want them to know that the world knows who Indonesia is. I want them to know that God knows who they are, where they come from, and cares about them and their lives. That is really what I am doing here. I am not just learning one language and teaching another, but I am here to be a live witness of the power and love of God for them. I am a witness, not presently and actively evangelizing, but living proof that God can use young people, and that He cares for these students. He cares for Besta, and Ifan, and Mita and Ceski. All of them. That is my update today, so that you know what I am doing...day to day, and prayer to prayer. So, good night all. I love you. Please keep me in your prayers that I would remember why I am here when it gets difficult. To remember that I really am a missionary, and not just a tourist. Please pray that He has His way here. Talk to you again soon. 

Musings

You know, I really hate sin...I hate it. It brings so much death and destruction. During the past few days a lot of the kids here in Penuai have been watching movies that have been violent, bloody, and filled with "inappropriate humor", and on top of that are the daily things that we deal with. I know that when you get closer to people you sometimes find out things that are sad and hurtful, but sometimes, they are really sad and hurtful. I guess I am feeling that lately I have been surrounded by a lot of things that tear down your spirit.   

Philippians 4: 8 says "Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things." These are the things that I always try to remember, but it can be hard with a constant bombarding of everything that is horrible, twisted, and wrong. I guess the obvious thing that comes to mind would be "Well then just don't watch the movie..." But it is so much more than that, it is dealing with life, with people, their past, their future, what they want versus what they do; I am even reading a book about missionaries, and I know that they are going to die, which is just more violence. I know that God gives us grace, and helps us through. He is always helping me. 

I think I just have a dream of a better world, but sin, the notion of "self before God" is deeply rooted in this earth. C. S. Lewis said "This may not be the best world that could exist, but it is in fact the only world that could exist." I know he is right, I know what free choice means. This doesn't seem to be much of a blog, but I wanted to just write out some of my thoughts. I guess I would just ask that you please keep praying for me/us here, that truth and righteousness and mercy would reign, that people would walk in the light, and that Penuai would really be the place of healing that it is meant to be. I love you all very much. 

Me

Just a Blip

You know, God is so good. I have just been contemplating His goodness for the past few days. Every time there is something that goes wrong...which has happened a lot these past few weeks, all I have to do is say "God, this is Your moment." and He comes through. 

About a week and a half ago I was given the chance to preach at the Thursday night chapel that we have here on the compound. I didn't really know what to preach on so I went to one of my favorite scriptures which is Jeremiah 1:5-8 which says "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations. Then I said "Ah Lord God! Behold I cannot speak for I am a youth." But the Lord said to me "Do not say I am a youth for you shall go to all to whom I send you and whatever I command you, you shall speak. Do not be afraid of their faces for I am with you to deliver you says the Lord." I love this scripture because so often I have felt too young, but I wanted to tell my students that God had the ability to use them now if they would let Him. I ended up talking more about miracles than anything else. I challenged them to step out in faith and see what God would do. That was Thursday, on Friday I had just about everything go wrong, and I had a lot to deal with...but just as usual, God did what He does. 

At this point I have no problem believing God to provide financially, most of the time it is through all of you, but I was reminded this morning of when I went to Africa, and a customer at the coffee shop handed me a check for $2,000. There really is nothing that is impossible for God. I'm getting ready to start school, as you know, and honestly I am a little bit scared, as I have never been to school in a foreign country before, but I have full confidence that God will do what He does. I am encouraged, and I just wanted you all to be encouraged too. Much love! 

Just. About. There.

Well, I am finally just about finished with everything that I need to do for my visa, and then I will be all set to stay here in Indonesia for the next year!!!!! After going to Ungaran, and Semarang a couple of times, paying quite a bit of money, and at least 7 signatures to go with my fingerprints this morning, I have everything turned in and in the right file. I am exhausted tonight after I spent all day running around, but I am happy, and had a fun day. Now I am sitting here with a cup of tea, and listening to Michael Buble while looking at the stars and I feel very satisfied. I kind of miss home today, but I think it has more to do with the fact that I would love to just relax and talk to family....thank God for skype! But, as it is still only 7 am there, I will wait for at least another half an hour. 

I'm not really sure what is going to happen this weekend, but there is a possibility that Borobudur is in the running. That would be AMAZING! I have not been there yet, and since it is only like 45 minutes away, I think it would be a very happy thing to do. It's perhaps kind of funny that they charge over three times as much for a tourist as for an Indonesian, but if I have my KITAS with me (which hopefully I will tomorrow) then it is only Rp. 5000 more (that = .50). 

I have to admit that now that my school is getting closer I am beginning to be a little bit nervous. I know that it will be fine, and that I will have fun, but still...it is something new and different and I don't know exactly how it will all work out...although it will... =) 

Just a short blog tonight, but thats ok. I love you all dearly, and hope to hear form you soon....seriously.... ;) 

What I Have Been Up To

Hello Everyone. 

Everything is going pretty well here. I begin school on the 17th and am really excited that I will be able to understand so much more of what is going on around me. You never learn to appreciate communication so much as when it is not readily available to you. Tomorrow I must register with the police in Salatiga, and also either tomorrow or Thursday I will have to go to Semarang and register with the immigration there. Those things are (I believe) the last loose ends I need to tie together before school starts. Once school does start, I can tell you that I will be very busy. I will be in the class from 8 to 12 and then I will have 4 to 5 hours of homework. Things like going to the market and buying something, and translating newspapers and songs. I will also tell you that I will be using public transportation every day. This does not really bother me, but there have been at least 4 or 5 people who have suggested that I see if I can buy a motorcycle and get around that way. As I will be here for at least one year (maybe two) I consider that a reasonable option, so I am praying about it. Will you all pray with me? 

As for the teaching I have been doing, it is going quite well. Ps Sam finally defined what he wanted me to do as "cultivating a culture of speaking English." This is no easy task, in fact, it is impossible for me to do without Gods help...fortunately I have His help; last night for the first time I had a bunch of students really wanting to talk with me, have conversations, and really want to learn. Breakthrough! I am so thankful, and I am praying that it is a continuing thing. It is a matter of the students hearts being open to learning and feeling comfortable enough to try without fear of looking stupid or messing up. It is my hope and prayer that while I am here that they will practice enough, and feel comfortable enough practicing that they become quite good. Honestly if you are willing to study, and to try then you can do just about anything you want to do...even learn new languages. My plan is to teach them through discipleship as well as the basic studying of the language. We will just have to see how it all works out once I start school. 

The other thing I have to tell you about is Saturday. This weekend, of course, was the first of September, so we began our plans of transforming the village outside of Salatiga. This week was the "lets open their hearts week." where we passed out rice, sugar, noodles, and oil for free, and sold eggs, and school supplies for really cheap. We had music playing, and a really long line. It was so much fun! At first they could not figure out where to place me, mostly because I don't really speak the language yet, but they found a place and I had fun handing out the care packages. Afterwards a bunch of us went to a youth meeting and had a bonfire and played games. What a great way to spend a Saturday! I love living life this way. Take care of people, and then go have some fun. 

Next week they will be having an "Empowering Women" conference to help the prostitutes get out of their present situation. Unfortunately the people who need the money the most don't really get it, because once you have three kids (as a prostitute) you don't get as many customers. It is a sad way to live life, and so the goal is to teach them about the love of Christ, and about entrepreneurship. We want them to be able to make more money without going through the horror of life the way they now live it. The third weekend we will have kind of a Talk Show, and Ps. Sam will be giving away his autobiography as a prize. Please pray for Ps Sam too, as this whole endeavor is costing him over $2,000. I think I mentioned that before. 

As for me personally, I am good. I love it here, as I assume you all know by now. I have fun with my friends, and the students, and when I was in Singapore I missed them. I have had a little bit of warfare though, sometimes I have difficulty thinking straight, and deal with feelings of fear that they don't really want me here. I know that this is not the truth, but it comes at me some days, so please be praying for that. Last night I had a dream that was significant enough for me to wake up at 3.30am knowing that I was in the midst of spiritual warfare, so if you could all be praying about that it would be really appreciated. I love you all so much and would love it if you would leave a comment. In fact, if anyone wants to write me a message on fb, or write me a letter I would love to hear from you all........ (ahem.. hint hint) .... I pray for you all the time and hope all is well with you. See you soon. All my love. 

Stephanie